Thursday, June 25, 2009

it's pity party time

The emotional overload has begun. I don't know why yesterday went so smoothly, except perhaps for the fact that I had Hubby all day and we were home together, not stuck at work.

Today sucks already. I can feel the cramping and the weird pain in my cervix beginning. My body is getting ready to expel my poor dead baby-like entity, and all I can do is sit here and try not to cry.

bleh.

11 comments:

  1. i am so sorry, you are right, it sucks :(
    ((hugs))

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  2. I'm sorry. It sucks. Cry if you want to.

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  3. I'm sorry. It does suck. You're allowed to cry and scream and rant and rave.
    ((hugs))

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  4. Oh Wifey I'm so sorry. But please know you're not alone in this. I've found that I always have a day of shock or disconnect when I confirm I'm miscarrying...then bam a day or two later the landslide begins! It usually confuses my husband because one day I'm strong and joking, talking about how it's not the end of the world and this time I'll be ok...but over the next days & weeks & months my emotions rage and I feel so helpless and lost. I've learned that this is a journey. In fact I'm starting to see a pattern for my greif. Although I HATE going through it, and am fearful each time I try that I will have to face this battle again, I know now that there is a beginning and an end to my grief. So please hang on to the fact that although this is going to be another wild roller coaster ride of emotions, it will eventually end. We're all here for you. Keep blogging it helps to offload your pain.

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  5. I find that the worst time is the time when you feel helpless: the time between finding out and being able to try again. And it's a loooong time (or so it feels.) I'm sorry that there's nothing that can be done to speed it up, and I'm sorry that you're going through it again. I'm so glad though, that you have your husband to go through it with because it seems like he "gets it" more than most.

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  6. Here from ICLW. I'm so sorry about your loss sweetie. (((HUGS)))

    Tammy
    www.twondra.blogspot.com

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  7. That weird cervix pain is such a strange aspect of miscarriage I think- we learn little things about what birth might be like (on a much smaller scale of course in early miscarriages), but get nothing but sadness and loss for our trouble. I'm so, so, so sorry that you have to go through this again. I wish you a great change in luck.

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  8. I am just so sorry. Wishing that things would work out for those who are already loving parents, only without living children. Sending hugs. ICLW

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  9. she - you are so right! I HATE having to wait before trying again. It all feels so out of my control.

    Christa - thank you. It sure does help to know there are those who get it, although I wish there weren't.

    Busted Tube - I always think, when I'm miscarrying, that this is probably the closest I'll get to birth. That weird cervical pain, the cramps that come in intervals like contractions.... ugggh.

    Thank you all, again and again and again, for your kind words. They truly do lift my spirit at a time when I really need it.

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  10. I'm so very sorry. It sucks so bad. I know that doesn't really help, but I'll be thinking of you.

    BTW, I'm a big fan of crying. I say, go for it.

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  11. I'm so sorry. :(

    (((Hugs)))

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