sometimes.....

I just really hate my life.

I have to work tomorrow (actually, in 5 hours) and I can't sleep. My anxiety level is off the charts right now.

Worse yet, I think I might have become lactose intolerant. (Is it possible to become lactose intolerant after a lifetime love affair with dairy? I'll have to consult Dr. Google...) Today I reached for my favorite foods in an effort to eat my feelings, my favorite foods being cheese and ice cream (not together - that would be weird. Or maybe delicious). And my stomach has been royally fucked up all day. When I tucked into my bowl of Peanut Butter Panic <3 I could literally feel my whole digestive tract protest the first bite, and I've been becoming very well acquainted with my bathroom since.

Of course, I finished the whole bowl in between dashes to the crapper. I don't waste ice cream. That would be silly.

And I have to ask the universe, are you fucking serious?

Please don't take ice cream from me too. And cheese. You've already taken my babies, my dog, bread, pasta, my self esteem, running (for the moment, anyway), my sanity, hope.

Let me keep the fucking ice cream, ya bastard.